Coverage/Script Doctoring Sample_2
We need to get to know Erwin's private & public life in this beginning sequence-
We need to know his public life as a scientist, and his private life, his relationships. Whether he is in love with Marian, or Qin, or Sarah- exposition needed to be set up clearer here.
I recommend Vogler’s writer’s journey to set up characters archetype. Bring in a Herald/Mentor to do the expositions. So the viewers are not left confused! There can be puzzle, mystery, but there should be no confusion! Once the viewer is confused, they would not want to keep watching.